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Trick or treating: “I don’t know if there are real ghosts or goblins, but there are always more trick-or-treaters than neighborhood kids.”  Robert Breault, American operatic tenor

As a recovering chocoholic, I read the headline with interest:

“Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups top Snickers on Halloween.”

This blockbuster bit of news comes at a time when children everywhere are charting their Halloween walking paths.

I don’t think kids have changed much since I mapped out my door-to-door route in the 1950s and ’60s. The objective? Fill a brown, paper grocery sack with candy so I could gorge my sugar needs until Christmas.

The bag was stowed in a downstairs closet at the old home place, where I could conveniently access it undetected and at any time.

Even though the goal was a large quantity of sweets, any trick-or-treater worth his M&M’s knew which homes offered up larger candy bars instead of mere hard candy or popcorn. If a home supplied Snickers bars, for instance, you can bet the address activated a flashing red light on the Halloween route map.

But back to Reese’s, which are OK, but you have to like peanut butter. I’m not knocking it, but compared to the pure delight of a Snickers, or a bag of caramels, it’s definitely second shelf confectionary.

I confess to being a bit suspicious of the claim, anyhow. The story, from USA Today, was based on a poll from Monmouth University. Incredibly, the poll said that more than twice the number of people chose Reese’s over Snickers.

And if that doesn’t stretch credulity, the poll also said that M&M’s – my personal favorite after Snickers if it is peanut M&M’s – ranked third.  Third!

Meanwhile, Hershey bars tied with candy corn for fourth, which I believe is yet another indication of the dubiousness of the poll.

You may think I’m biased or at the very least ill-informed. But consider this: Business Insider reports that, which sells bulk candy across the U.S., says Skittles is No. 1, followed by Reese’s and M&M’s.

Business Insider also provided a United States map, which purports to show the favorite Halloween candy in each state.  South Dakota’s favorite? Starbursts. And if you think that’s a bit strange, guess what North Dakota trick-or-treaters prefer: candy corn.

This is topped only by Montana’s odd proclivity for – are you ready for this – Double Bubble. It has to be the influx of all of those Californians.

All this talk about candy and Halloween makes me wonder: Am I too old to suit up?

Oct. 30, 2019